Keeping It Real

Have you noticed how shallow and made up our world can be?  Cover girl, faux finishes, cliff notes, plastic and tweets abound. Vulnerability, courage, character and hard work is too time consuming. 

Relationships tend to happen during commercials and bathroom breaks and waiting lines.

Easy come and easy go.  Safe and sanitized.

Spending a life to get two minutes of fame or a plastic award or shiny medal.  Shoving children in the spotlight hoping for a shot at fame and fortune.   Or at least a chance on the annual Christmas letter. Lessons, clubs and photo ops take up all of our time. (I'm not against all of these things in themselves.)

What drives us to protecting from failure?  When did struggle and risk become entwined with failure?

It reminds me of when I was a young girl and did horse 4-H.  Parents would buy very expensive and highly trained horses and then hire highly paid trainers for the kids plus the coaches to keep the kids on the horses.  The parents washed and groomed and saddled and fed.  The kids stood by keeping their white shirts clean.  When asked a Dad said, "I don't want them to mess it up or ruin it...or get hurt."

 The horses showed the kids.

I was a good rider.  Not because of my "training" but because of my vulnerability, courage, failure and experience that came from pain and hard work.  

Oh yes...don't forget the "safe" factor.  Or the struggle.  Or the pain.  Or the involvement of the parent with the child.  The tears and the failures and the starting all over again.

When my boys did horse 4-H for their limited time they used the horses they were breaking and training with MY coaching.  My kids got stepped on and frustrated and struggled.  I cried.  They cried.  We fought.  A few temper tantrums happened here and there.   

People called us stubborn.

I called it "Keeping it Real!"

I bemoan the lack of courage and truthfully the lack of manhood and womanhood in our world. 

 Old people talk fearfully about this next generation of quitters.  Parents fret and stew over lack of initiative and direction when maybe some of it it is just the struggle. 

Maybe the problem is us.

I want to fix and prod and shake em and move them along because I'm uncomfortable with the process.

I believe with all my heart that kids need us to keep it real.  To keep the routine, schedule, chores and normal everyday family lives happening.  They need us to pull them back or down or lift them up.  

In order to move forward our children need their feet on the ground and muscles in their character.

Keeping it real does that.