HEART'S CRY

Healthy relationships are built through experience.  All of those tiny second by second, interactions.     It is simple and happening all around us.  It's hard and happens within us. I remember each of my boys' exploration as infants.  They would pull themselves up to the edge of furniture and begin those tottering steps of walking.   My responses and reactions to their exploration impacted their confidence.  If I would jump or in some way tell them not to, they would hesitate and typically fall.   So I learned to smile, watch, encourage and stand close in as nonchalant a matter as possible.   Controlling (as much as possible) my own fear of letting go.   It is hard work to grow up and involves very difficult struggle.  At the same time, it is hard work to let go.  To deal with the fear and hang ups within. When my oldest went to school at a new "huge" school I was the terrified one....

Dear friends and fellow moms, The seasons are changing Wind rushing around Moments are raining Time pounds out a steady beat threatening to tear us down For those soft skin babies Are hard muscled men Changes and transitions making our roles hazy Pondering time and time again Our hearts throb Our belly twists and aches Only God is privy to our sobs He knows friend, how our heart breaks They were never ours to keep They are only ours to hold So while we may weep Their futures untold They our out of our hands And we let them go God knows His plans And His love will overflow We release them to Him To guard and defend To protect and him them in His will and His love transcends They still need us We will be a safe haven Through life's maze, we will remain thus Our devotion unshaken    

Spring amazes me. Each morning shows new growth.  Hostas pushing out of its cover of leaves and mulch.  Grasses, perennials and flowers seem to be growing overnight.   Walking around my yard becomes a treasure hunt. The energy each plant gathered last summer and stored through the winter is busting out!  It is as if these bulbs, tubors and seeds were just waiting for the opportunity to bloom.  To produce.  To bust through the hardened soil. Being ready for an opportunity when it comes. The simplicity of   staying,  being whom I'm called to be,  preparing for an opportunity,  waiting ...then busting through the tough patches. Now is the time!!!  To stay and be ready!

See with me. I want to be known by you. Everyone wants to be known.   We can't escape our hardwired desire for relationship. It's a need and a cry of our heart. And, we are starving. Our babies, preschoolers, teenagers, young adults, trying to be adults and old adults....are malnourished and desperate. Our souls cry out to be known. A still small voice whispers... "See with ME.  I want to be known by you." The world settles off my shoulders and a quietness overtakes my mind. God, wants us to see with Him and to be known by us. He wants us to see the way He sees.  He wants us to see what He sees in us and in others.   He wants us to see the big picture of eternity and the small tears of a small child.   He wants us to see the neighbor and the person shopping at the store.   He wants us to see our spouses and our children. I believe He wants us to see the tips of new growth in the back ya...

My favorite people are those who drive a stake in the ground and stay until God releases them.  They don't settle in a puddle of apathy or hide under a rock. They don't shut their eyes from the messages all around them.  Heads high, shoulders back, pushing through and moving forward...this kind of bold fierceness comes from experiencing God's grace over and over again and finding Him tried and true.  My Great-Grandparents homesteading and thriving through the depression...with 8 kids.  Doing whatever it took. My Grandmother who asked God to keep her alive until she sees her husband come to know the Lord.  She keeps praying.  She never gives up.   The Pastors and their wives who work full time and pastor full time and are afraid they have offered their children on the altar of ministry.  Who "stay in the land God has called them to." My husband, who said, "Our boys will graduate here," and they have. My older neig...

LOVE So you want to help or change the world or change yourself? It's not complicated.   Simple BUT difficult. Genetics or respectable family lineage doesn't do it.   A class won't change it.   A degree, certification or accolades is just a tool. Professional development is not a solution. It's not another strategy, program or great trend. IT'S A WAY OF THINKING. Of believing.  Of loving.  Of love, hope, mercy and acceptance. Positive intentionality. Believing in people.  Believing in their God-given potential.   Loving others the way God loves us.  He loves us...we love them. Love that does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; LOVE that bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. LOVE never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge...

Be still, Heather!  This was said to me millions of times in millions of ways.  Usually with the disappointed frown of an authority figure.   So at 16 or 17, when God said to me, "Be still, Heather, and know I am God," I didn't quite know how to take it. I was in my Aunt and Uncle's spare room at their house by the lake.  The window opened and the whispering of pines filled my room.  I was tied in knots and the more I fought to get free, the more encased I became.   Questions filled my mind.  Not gentle reflective questions!  No, these were piercing, stabbing and wounding questions.   That's when I heard Him say, "Be Still, Heather, and know I am God." It wasn't just the words that filled my mind with peace.  The presence of love and nurture and bigness took all fear away.   The night before my wedding, it dawned on me.  I'm only 19.  What the heck am I doing?  We have no...

I've not written in quite some time and feel a little like meeting someone for the first time. Inadequacy seems to be the cry of my heart as of late.  A feeling without words.  An experience without a context.  Communication without words. Underneath the still waters lie A bed of thorns  A place of pain to supply Disrupts my secret place Demons conjuring My peace to encase Rushing thoughts barely whisper  Tormenting visions Silently blister Old wounds crossed Exposing vicious Harassing thoughts   Soothing balm  His Psalm quiets the fears Resting tonight within His Palm