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Dear boys, remember our place. It is always here.


Dear boys,

I stood in the dark tonight in our place.  You know the one.  The one God carved out just for us.

Nestled in a draw between two worlds.  Bringing together past and present and eventually future.

While, it was not the land belonging to us we left behind in our coming.  Nor would it ever be ours in ownership.  It is our place.

A small piece of land and memory suspended in time in your Mama's mind and heart.

Our house and yard tended to be everyone's place.   The church is everyone's place.

This...this was just our place.

 A place for three boys and their mom.

When I am here, on nights like tonight, I miss you more then you can imagine.

This place of ours.  Contentment, belonging and longing fill my heart.

 The girls' hooves pounding in the night to make their way to freshly thrown hay makes me smile.  I pause and find myself holding my breath. 

 Maybe time will stand still in this moment.  You feel so close.

This is our place.  Our place flowing richly upon memories.  Laughter and tears.  Joy and regret.  Challenge and overcoming.

I stand in our place overcome with a knowing.

You see, this was my dream I realize.   The dream of my heart as a young girl of a place with horses and kids.

My dream is not one that is to come, but rather what was.  Our place.

Oh boys, my dream has always been and always will be you.  To be with you in our place suspended between what once was and what is and what will always be.

I stand here tonight in our place and I miss you.

And then I know...  Our place will always be.   No one can take away our place and no one can leave it behind.

 Our place is ongoing. Suspended in time and our memories.  Our place between time and above time.

Our place will always be right here in my heart.

Love,
Mom

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