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My Naked Heart' Cry: Looked After


To be looked after.   I'm a very independent person and yet the deepest longing of my heart is to be looked after.  This is one of those visceral hungers that isn't easily filled.

To be protected.  To know that someone has my back.  To be "checked on," so to speak.  "Did you make it?" "How are you?" etc. etc.  Just because I'm strong and can do it alone...doesn't mean I want to do it alone! 

One of those longings that we are given at birth...when we are the most vulnerable.  To be protected, wanted and treasured.

I learned early when people gave me that "look" of either I'm sorry for you or you are a pest to become very independent.  I couldn't figure them out.  Why were they looking at me that way?  What is wrong with me?  So if people were too busy surviving to really look after me then I would just "do it myself."  

I learned to be self-reliant because I knew I was alone.  I would go and do fearlessly because I didn't see that worry or protectiveness reflected back to me.  

So sometimes in my adult life I am almost desperate to know I'm not alone.  I'll pester and call.  The old familiar panic creeps in.  Then... 

Then...I hear that still small voice and the hand that touches those deepest place of my heart say, "I'm here.  Be Still and know that I'm God and I'm here.  Where can you go from my presence?  I know you so well that I've counted every hair on your head."  

And I rest.  Rest in Him knowing that He is the cry of my Heart.  He has been "looking after me" for as long as I've lived and will live.  What security and peace.


As a side note...Parents, teachers, neighbors, pastors and youth leaders.....those kids who are taking stupid risks or the ones who cling or the ones who push you away?  You are the concrete person in their lives...  You are those hands and feet of God... 

Make sure today that you let them know that they are "looked after" and cherished and never forgotten.  Make sure they know that you have their back.

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