"You are in the same boat. You either paddle together or sink together!" That was our philosophy of parenting our three boys.
When they were little and had just gotten in trouble..."He did it. He said..." The finger pointing began. "You are in the same boat," we would say and all of them were sent for a little time out. The minute as parents we think that we can decipher and merit out who exactly was the instigator and who is the poor little victim then we have set ourselves up for a nightmare of a power struggle. In addition all our kids learn is to blame. This little nugget and strategy really saved us! I'm thinking Dr. Leman is where we learned about this.
As boys began playing sports, working and pursuing their dreams this was the foundation that we built on. Personal responsibility FOR themselves and responsibility TO their family and their team.
Our boys struggled through a lot of things and were not born instant superstars.
However, they were born fighters, thinkers and leaders!
When our middle son began getting good in football. Maybe he had a super sack or amazing tackles. Oh YES...WE DID STRUT as parents but tried to do it out of his earshot. We were not perfect but tried very hard to focus on the team.
What he heard from us was "awesome hit" and way to pull your team together on the side." "I can tell how well you are going to play by how you act on the sidelines." We talked tons about how hard the team worked, their perseverance and character and where we saw leadership.
I watch how my boys respond to coaches and to those kids on the side. I watch for servant leadership and humbleness.
My oldest learned this the minute he hit bootcamp and now as a SERE instructor models this for his guys. Guess what I try to ask most about? Yep. His guys!
Finally, we model it... I hope. My husband as Pastor scrubs toilets, makes coffee and serves meals. He speaks about church family and knows that he is not the all in all. In education I know that the parents, providers, paras etc...we are all a team.
We are not just called one...we are one!
So as all things...so goes it in football so goes it in life.
Personal and role responsibility FOR ourselves and responsibility TO the team. No one person loses the game and no one person wins the game.
Comments
Post a Comment