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The Disruption and Pain and Completion of Being a Family


To love the way we love our families can be absolutely devastating.   Not in the typical use of the word.  Completely disrupting and confounding!!

Each time, a sister was born, my family was disrupted.  "It's a girl," was said over and over and over and over!  Life was not the same as before.  Louder and more chaotic and better.

When my boys were born, I was completely disrupted.  I was thoroughly turned inside out and outside in and upside down.  I would never be the same.  The path I was on blocked and another chosen for me.  I've walked down this path with great pride and desire.  Love that is painful and aching and complete was born as well.

To live and love within families is a painful road to take.  Wouldn't it be so much "easier" to walk the path of selfishness?  To think only of oneself?  To spend one's energy, time and effort only on the "me."

For example, if had not been "disrupted" by my children and my sisters, would I have spent the past week crying and burdened?  My sisters live in the most devastated part of the South Dakota blizzard.  I'm broken for them.

Today, when I can't go to my son's college football game, I'm devastated.   Each time I miss a pinning or promotion for my oldest or an activity for my youngest, I'm broken.

And yet, families make us complete.  Not in the unhealthy and enmeshed, but in the wholeness.  

The wholeness of a complete and real relationship that family brings.  With all of it's disruption, pain, joy and contentment.


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